Treatment Philosophy, Part II
Short Version:
You and I together will play chess against today, so you can have a better tomorrow. This is a game we can enjoy and win!
Long Version:
Psychological disorders.
There are many “disorders” classified as psychopathology—in fact, I once memorized verbatim every single one of them and all the criterion listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). Made my professors smile. And I have spent the last 17 years trying hard to forget it all—making my professors un-smile. Based on nearly two decades of effectively helping people change, I’ve found those labels often to be inaccurate, irrelevant, limiting, distancing, disabling, distracting, and/or harmful.
I believe much of what is diagnosed as “psychopathology” is simply the healthy, human brain trying to be helpful in unhelpful ways. If you effectively treat the underlying functions of distress, the disorder often goes away. If you simply treat emotional distress, a good, healthy brain will become even more distressed again to get your attention to take care of something important. Therefore, I see past the dis-ease and work hard to accurately see and effectively treat your entire person in the context of your life.
Everything you do and everything you don’t do matters! You are either moving towards who you want to become, or away.
Emotions.
The strategy to get short-term relief from dis-ease often results in staying the same—or getting worse—when the necessary change is very important. In the long term, avoidance of distress will create even more suffering and/or get you diagnosed with a “disorder.”
Emotional discomfort can better be explained by your coping mechanisms, core beliefs, habits of thinking and behaving, discrepancy between your expectations and the reality of your life, and ways in which you move in this world versus how you would prefer to move.
Emotions are usually by-products of thoughts designed to get your attention to take care of a basic need, keep you safe, help you heal, and/or motivate you to change your behavior.
The challenge is you might want immediate relief from your distress or dis-ease, and consequently find ways to escape or avoid. Perfectly natural. In fact, this is not only natural but our culture markets “distress-intolerance”—so we often automatically seek immediate relief from our symptoms.
A new way to conceptualize the treatment of disorders.
The treatment of “disorders” might better be thought of as a chess game against the status quo. Think of it as a game to strategically help the healthy human brain develop greater cognitive flexibility and learn new skills. Then you can make important internal and external changes to relieve dis-ease effectively and create healthier habits so you can intentionally Live Life Well with ease.
Chess and change are wonderful games. Deceptively simple, challenging, and great fun.
If you want to get out of a hole, put down your shovel.
Out-maneuvering the brain and its tendency to seek immediate relief or stay the same when distressed isn’t easy! Why? Because depression works for depression, and anxiety works for anxiety. Why? Because your brain is trying to be helpful, not hurtful!
Anti-depressant and anti-anxiety behaviors.
At times, you can simply engage in acts against nature to get back in-line with nature. Simply do the opposite from what your brain offers the next time you are depressed or anxious; for example, instead of not going to the gym, go; if you are not socializing with your friends, socialize; if you are sleeping in, wake up earlier; if you are avoiding crowds, welcome them; if you are desiring fast food, make a healthy dinner, etc. And if you do these anti-depressant or anti-anxiety behaviors intentionally for a week or three, you will soon find yourself less distressed—probably within days.
Sometimes your brain can be as easily fooled into health as into suffering—we grow what we nurture. Our lives go in the direction of our eyes—so be careful where you look.
Sometimes it’s much, much more difficult.
There are many reasons this could be hard. You may have practiced suffering for a long time, and the thoughts and behaviors are so automatic you can’t catch them to challenge and change. You’re going through an exceptionally difficult time in life. You feel threatened or blocked. You’re still recovering from trauma. And/or you still have very difficult changes that need correcting to get back in-line with your values.
Consequently, getting unstuck from emotional distress requires a lot more work. And since your thoughts are often the problem, trying to think yourself out of your depression and/or anxiety will work about as well as using a shovel to get out of a hole.
It might be helpful to have an impartial, well-trained (moderately funny), and experienced coach to help you better understand and teach you new skills. You may need someone to laugh with you—not at you, tap you on the shoulder, take your shovel, and point to the ladder.
Learning to work with nature on its terms makes it more natural to thrive, not just to survive.
This new approach is deceptively simple, challenging, and fun!
